Still keeping America in business (and China, too), but this time with two legs. Just wait till I get my stimulus check!

Well, it was getting dark and I just didn’t feel like dealing with it. I left it for the morning.

Got up this morning and checked the patio. No mouse barf!

Thank you, possum!

Every household should have its own possum. They make the best mess-disappearers.

The cans rest on a bed of crushed oak and camphor leaves gently pulverized by rotating rubber-covered wheels and spread to a fine, evenly distributed layer by a mechanical claw.

YES — I read it.
NO — I haven’t read it.
MAYBE — I don’t remember.

First grade

1. Green Eggs and Ham, Dr. Seuss YES
2. The Foot Book, Dr. Seuss NO
3. Are You My Mother? P.D. Eastman MAYBE
4. Hop on Pop, Dr. Seuss YES
5. Biscuit, Alyssa Capucilli NO

Second grade

1. If You Give a Mouse a Cookie, Laura Numeroff YES
2. Green Eggs and Ham YES
3. The Very Hungry Caterpillar, Eric Carle NO
4. If You Give a Moose a Muffin, Numeroff NO
5. If You Give a Pig a Pancake, Numeroff NO

Third grade

1. Charlotte’s Web, E.B. White YES
2. Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs, Judi Barrett NO
3. Officer Buckle and Gloria, Peggy Rathmann NO
4. The True Story of the 3 Little Pigs, Jon Scieszka NO
5. Dogzilla, Dav Pilkey NO, but it sounds like a fun book.

Fourth grade

1. Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing, Judy Blume NO, not even one of her books, although I’ve heard great things about them.
2. Sarah, Plain and Tall, Patricia MacLachlan NO
3. Because of Winn-Dixie, Kate DiCamillo NO
4. Charlotte’s Web
5. Stone Fox, John Gardiner NO

Fifth grade

1. Bridge to Terabithia, Katherine Paterson NO
2. Hatchet, Gary Paulsen NO
3. Holes, Louis Sachar NO
4. The Sign of the Beaver, Elizabeth Speare NO
5. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, J.K. Rowling YES

Sixth grade

1. Hatchet
2. Bridge to Terabithia
3. Holes
4. Number the Stars, Lois Lowry NO
5. The Bad Beginning, Lemony Snicket NO

Seventh grade

1. The Outsiders, S.E. Hinton YES
2. Holes
3. The Giver, Lowry NO
4. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone
5. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Rowling MAYBE

Eighth grade

1. The Outsiders
2. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
3. The Giver
4. Holes
5. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, Rowling NO

Ninth-12th grade

1. To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee YES
2. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
3. Of Mice and Men, John Steinbeck NO
4. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone
5. *A Child Called ‘It,’ * Dave Pelzer NO

Wedded to convention, unable to see their own bigotry, small.

The writer who can’t distinguish truth from a peanut-butter sandwich can never write good fiction. What he affirms we deny, throwing away his book in indignation; or if he affirms nothing, not even our oneness in sad or comic helplessness, and insists that he’s perfectly right to do so, we confute him by closing his books. (John Gardner, The Art of Fiction)

The Herald Standard - News - Obituaries
Sandra K. Williams, 57, of Mount Holly Springs, passed away Sunday, April 27, 2008, at . . .

But then, I’m not 57 and I don’t live in Mount Holly Springs, either.

See the first blue can on the left? It’s ready for the blue can in the foreground to swirl toward it. What a lousy dancer that blue can on the right is. It’s got three left wheels.

Still quivering, but it was in no condition to escape. Made my stomach lurch to see it. Don’t look at the photos if you’re squeamish. (more…)